school: caiman

[shaft]

Comments

week 0, saturday

[shaft]

FROM: undying@Wiwaldi.edu

How strong would you say you are?

[headsplitter]

FROM: hungrybug@Wiwaldi.edu
TO: undying@Wiwaldi.edu

waho fhis.?
super dstrongalso

[shaft]

And do you get sick easily?

[headsplitter]

dnt7 trhink so havnet yet
who

[shaft]

Want to try something fun?

This is Claude.

week 1, wednesday (1/2)

[shaft]

FROM: undying@Wiwaldi.edu

Caiman, I need a favour.

[shaft]

It has nothing to do with mushrooms.

[headsplitter]

I hope not I have had too much encounters with mushrooms for my entire life what is it

[shaft]

Let me in.

[headsplitter]

In

[ HELLO? IS THIS AT THE DORMS? CAIMAN'S LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW. ]

THURSDAY MORNING? - 1/2

[headsplitter]

FROM: hungrybug@Wiwaldi.edu

---

Uh so I forgot to ask but when are you returning the couch I have

2/2

[headsplitter]

Things happened

[shaft]

[ you have a lot of nerve ]

I'm not.

[headsplitter]

But you said you were going to

[shaft]

That was before you convinced everyone in the Fall dorm to steal OUR couch and toilet seats.

WEEK 2, MONDAY - FARMS.

[headsplitter]

[ Caiman is out here by the farms, picking up a few handheld farming tools and giving them a swing. Seeing what works efficiently as a weapon! And he doesn't notice the goat that comes up behind him and bites him in the ass. ]

Ow! Fuck -- lay off! I don't think I'm allowed to kill you but I'll put you in a pen and surround you with dogs!

[ The goat doesn't care. Help. ]

[shaft]

[ Surely Caiman can handle himself.

Claude watches him with a grin. ]

Making friends?

[headsplitter]

[ He can eventually, it's just a shipwreck until he eventually does.

He glances up at Claude with lizard scowl that's due to the goat, but it's not like he brightens up miles when he sees him either. ]

No! This thing bit me! [ In the butt! ]

[shaft]

It's just pulling your pigtails.

[ But he will walk over to gently guide the goat away...

Only to get headbutted for his efforts and knocked onto his ass. ]

[headsplitter]

I don't have a pig tail. [ Misunderstandings continue. But he watches Claude try to guide the goat away... and just get tackled down too. ]

Jeez, these animals are rough! I'm getting out of this shed! [ C'MON CLAUDE. ]

WEEK 3, MONDAY - HORSE?

[headsplitter]

[ Horse class. Caiman is dead-eyed and now loaded with way more horse knowledge than he ever even thought he needed in his garbage life. And now it's the end of it and he thinks he's supposed to pick which one is... better??? He stares down at his notes (he tried to be a good student) then across at Claude who is now government assigned his partner/group member/however way they're doing this stuff. ]

...A horse killed a guy last week, cars are better.

[ Sorry professor that's just how it is. She looks like she's about to have an aneurysm for some reason. Caiman just glances over at her with a grimace because he thinks she's WEIRD.

Right then, though, Claude will get a very strange memory. It's fuzzy and it's hard to make out, kind of like trying to see it through bloody water. Watching from a platform above, he sees a guy be accosted by someone much larger. He seems to be offering the first guy some kind of deal -- wristbands that will amplify his smoke production, make his magic stronger, but for a ridiculous price. Threatening him in turn when he refuses to pay that price. A fight breaks out, the first guy immediately retaliating with a stake in that teacher's wrist.

'You bastard...! I won't forgive you. I'll erase you with my magic...!'

Then he -- the one who probably is the owner of this memory -- makes his timely appearance. Except it's not Caiman...? It's someone else, but his features are hard to make out, even with all the black and the gas mask.

'I heard aaaaall of that. All of it!' he says, lazily as he hangs down from a vent. 'So it's you, who's been hurting people then making students disappear, huh? It's time to stop the dirty business, teacher!'

The 'teacher' snarls, and threatens to erase them both -- because ██████ has been a thorn in his side for too long, anyway. But he takes out a knife from his jacket, and before the teacher can shoot his magic at them -- in the blink of an eye, his arms are sliced up and in pieces. He falls to the ground, passing out from the shock. ██████ squats down beside him, sighing.

'Aw shit. What do we do? When he wakes up, we're totally gonna get expelled...'

---

-- And then suddenly, like that, they're back. ]

...Whoa, what the hell was that?

'

[shaft]

[ What the hell was that?

Claude just gapes at Caiman, mouth open. ]

What?!

[headsplitter]

[ My solitary leftover comma on my past post.................

Caiman looks back at Claude with just as much surprise. His mouth is bigger, but only physically. ]

Wh -- what do you mean what?! I don't know either!

[shaft]

Isn't that your memory?!

[ Totally ignoring this class. ]

[headsplitter]

[ This class sucks ANYWAY. ]

It's -- er, I mean, but I don't -- [ Shit, how do words? ] But I don't remember that! I don't know who those people are...!