school: caiman

[shaft]

Comments

[headsplitter]

I hope not I have had too much encounters with mushrooms for my entire life what is it

[shaft]

Let me in.

[headsplitter]

In

[ HELLO? IS THIS AT THE DORMS? CAIMAN'S LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW. ]

[shaft]

[ Claude waves from outside the dorm. Hi! ]

[headsplitter]

[ Ok. This is fine. Give Caiman a hot minute and he will open the suite door. ]

What??

[shaft]

Hey. Thanks.

[ He just walks in! Thanks Caiman! ]

[headsplitter]

[ HELLO ]

What, you got business here??? Why'd you ask me?!

[shaft]

Oh, don't mind me.

[ He's in the common room now! He's taking your couch. ]

[headsplitter]

[ ????????? ]

I'm minding! Why are you here!

[shaft]

I just wanted to try something.

[ He's dragging the couch down the hall now... bye... ]

[headsplitter]

[ OH LIKE LITERALLY TAKING THE COUCH INSTEAD OF JUST LOUNGING ON IT. GOD.

He grasps the opposite end of the couch. STOP. ]

Oi, you can't just come in and start tryin' to take our furniture!

[shaft]

[ Yanks on it!!! ]

I'll bring it back!

[headsplitter]

[ Wrestle me for the couch Claude. ]

But why?! You still haven't told me why?!

[shaft]

Caiman! [ He yells that with authority, glaring at him. ] I've had a really rough couple of days! Exhausting!

All I want right now is to take this couch, and if you were a friend, you would trust me.

[headsplitter]

[ Startled! BUT NOT ENOUGH TO LET THIS COUCH GO. ]

What happened to your own dorm's couch, dude? You can just sleep here if you're that tired!

[shaft]

[ UGH

HE JUST PULLS AS HARD AS HE CAN GIVE IT TO HIM ]

[headsplitter]

[ Can Claude win over a lizard......... but he's also pulling tho. Though, since Claude said it first: ]

If you think we're friends then you'd be able to tell me what's wrong! 'Cause that's what me and my friend promised!

[shaft]

[ That's actually a good point.

Claude stops pulling, looking Caiman in the eye. ]

I can't tell you. If I could, I would.

[headsplitter]

[ ...

Buh...

Caiman looks like he wants to protest but he's actually been in this kind of situation before?

Conflict...

... ]

You're gonna tell me later, right. And you're gonna bring this couch back?

[ I can't believe I'm going to tell Fall Dorm we've lost a whole ass couch. ]

[shaft]

[ Claude sighs in relief, and the smile he gives Caiman is genuine. ]

Yes, it's a promise.

[ Okay, back to desperately dragging this couch out. ]

I'm glad to have your friendship, you know.

[headsplitter]

[ I'm crying I hope you know Fall Dorm is going apeshit over me telling them we're missing a couch now. Caiman lets go... have your couch Claude, let your maybe-twink body drag it out into the wilds... ]

Yeah sure, whatever. [ Tsuntsun......?? ]

[shaft]

[ HE'S NOT A TWINK!!

But thanks, he's going to drag it right out the door. With only a little bit of struggle. ]

Haha, you don't sound pleased. Should I give you a hug for your troubles?

[headsplitter]

No! I don't want your hugs! Just take the couch and return it later!

[shaft]

All right. [ Gives Caiman a salute! ] I'll be seeing you later.

[ And so ended the friendship between Caiman and Claude. RIP Clauman. ]

[headsplitter]

[ It lasted for the briefest hint of spring on the wind........... but please the ship name I'm dying. Toddles off to send this poor man a text. ]