[making this the third time her head has been messed with here, thanks, she cannot WAIT to fuck this place up right back.
but-- well. then he mentions hugo, and that immediately has her attention, her gaze snapping back up to his face.]
You fought him? What-
[...it's possible he's just busy, or stuck elsewhere, maybe. she's wondered, since they all got back. there's been no sign of him. but the way claude went silent beforehand, the way he says it--
she thinks she knows, before she even finishes her question.]
[ They both know what his answer is going to be, just like Hugo's letter had said on Monday. They'd all hoped that they'd be clever enough, resourceful enough to find another solution for them all but.
There had been no time. ]
He was... being controlled. We tried knocking him unconscious, we tried reasoning with him, we even offered him his pocketwatch but he just threw it away like it was nothing.
Every time we knocked him out, he got back up and kept fighting. It was hurting him and much as it was us.
[ If he'd thought there was any other way. If he'd thought they could subdue him... he would've taken it. ]
[...damn it. of all the things this place has forced on them-- everyone else has come back, but will it be the same for him, when that's already happened? is there going to end up being a way? there's no way to know. there's a good chance that he's just--
that he's just gone.
and even if it's what he said to do, what he told them he wanted to happen, that doesn't ease the sting. not really. she hoped that, whether he ultimately took it or not, that he would get the chance to live.
she's silent as she stands and makes her way over to the couch, takes a seat on it with him. reaches over to take hold of one of his hands. her voice is quiet, slightly strained.]
...I trust you.
If it was you, then I trust-- that you did what needed to be done, Claude.
[ Claude had been staring at his hands as he spoke, the memories still vivid and awful. The image of Hugo furious and vengeful, breaking his own body from the inside as he used in his magic.
He squeezes Lucretia's hand, his other rubbing down his face. ]
We tried, Lucretia. We really- he almost killed Maya.
[ And Byleth. And he's sure that he would've killed Dimitri too. ]
...I don't know that there would have been a way. He warned us there wouldn't be a way to break him out of it, but I thought-- maybe he was wrong.
[it sounds like he wasn't, though. if there were a way, if he could be broken out, then surely between them... surely they would have managed, if it was possible.
her eyes sting, but she's fighting it for the moment.]
[he was. he never deserved to be dead in the first place, much less to die a second time, and she just... thinks of their last conversation.
-You're allowed to be selfish with your own life, whatever that means for you. I just-- want you to know that if you did decide to live, I would make a place for you.
-I've... never thought about it.
she doesn't pull away from the hand on her shoulder, won't reject the touch, but her free hand still covers her face as she takes in a shakier breath.
impossible things have happened here, and she's trying to think of that too, she really is. but for all of them to have gone through this, him with being controlled and them with being forced to put an end to it-- that's hard, too.]
[ His heart aches for her, for Hugo and for Maya. For all the people who cared for deeply for him, and who would've given blood to see him survive. And he wonders if Hugo had been just as desperate to live, at the end, and if that would make it all the worse that he'd never gotten the chance.
When Lucretia trembles, he draws her in closer so that she's leaning on him, rubbing a hand down her back. Another loss to weigh on their hearts. Another burden to set on their shoulders.
He hopes they find their freedom, before their hearts break entirely. ]
[it's been a while, honestly, since she really and truly leaned on anyone here. not that people haven't offered, but-- she doesn't tend to seek it out, not really. she's shouldered enough on her own.
but he draws her in to lean on him, offers that gesture and the comfort that comes with it, and that's what does it. something breaks, in the remainder of the wall she's tried to keep up between them, and she cries quietly on his shoulder.
even if they get him back, it won't fix what happened. she knows that all too well.]
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no subject
[making this the third time her head has been messed with here, thanks, she cannot WAIT to fuck this place up right back.
but-- well. then he mentions hugo, and that immediately has her attention, her gaze snapping back up to his face.]
You fought him? What-
[...it's possible he's just busy, or stuck elsewhere, maybe. she's wondered, since they all got back. there's been no sign of him. but the way claude went silent beforehand, the way he says it--
she thinks she knows, before she even finishes her question.]
...Claude, what happened?
no subject
There had been no time. ]
He was... being controlled. We tried knocking him unconscious, we tried reasoning with him, we even offered him his pocketwatch but he just threw it away like it was nothing.
Every time we knocked him out, he got back up and kept fighting. It was hurting him and much as it was us.
[ If he'd thought there was any other way. If he'd thought they could subdue him... he would've taken it. ]
We... I killed him.
no subject
that he's just gone.
and even if it's what he said to do, what he told them he wanted to happen, that doesn't ease the sting. not really. she hoped that, whether he ultimately took it or not, that he would get the chance to live.
she's silent as she stands and makes her way over to the couch, takes a seat on it with him. reaches over to take hold of one of his hands. her voice is quiet, slightly strained.]
...I trust you.
If it was you, then I trust-- that you did what needed to be done, Claude.
no subject
He squeezes Lucretia's hand, his other rubbing down his face. ]
We tried, Lucretia. We really- he almost killed Maya.
[ And Byleth. And he's sure that he would've killed Dimitri too. ]
I didn't know how to help him.
no subject
[it sounds like he wasn't, though. if there were a way, if he could be broken out, then surely between them... surely they would have managed, if it was possible.
her eyes sting, but she's fighting it for the moment.]
You did what you could.
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Hugo was just a kid. ]
... I'm sorry.
[ Not for failing, but for her loss. He settles a hand on her shoulder, gently holding on. ]
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-You're allowed to be selfish with your own life, whatever that means for you. I just-- want you to know that if you did decide to live, I would make a place for you.
-I've... never thought about it.
she doesn't pull away from the hand on her shoulder, won't reject the touch, but her free hand still covers her face as she takes in a shakier breath.
impossible things have happened here, and she's trying to think of that too, she really is. but for all of them to have gone through this, him with being controlled and them with being forced to put an end to it-- that's hard, too.]
no subject
When Lucretia trembles, he draws her in closer so that she's leaning on him, rubbing a hand down her back. Another loss to weigh on their hearts. Another burden to set on their shoulders.
He hopes they find their freedom, before their hearts break entirely. ]
no subject
but he draws her in to lean on him, offers that gesture and the comfort that comes with it, and that's what does it. something breaks, in the remainder of the wall she's tried to keep up between them, and she cries quietly on his shoulder.
even if they get him back, it won't fix what happened. she knows that all too well.]